No offense, Ottawa, but you were a little too clean. A little too organized.
You kind of speak French and you’re across the river from Québec, but you don’t have a single
ounce gram of European swagger.
Your public transportation is so efficient you can’t even muster up a real traffic jam. Oh, and you don’t even have un Metro, just dorky ultra modern red buses.
Sorry, Ottawa. But you’re kind of a downer.